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2022 Rexroad Family









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REXROAD — FULL VERSION

 

Headline:

They say you can work remotely anywhere these days—but for most of us, the NICU isn’t the first place that comes to mind

 

When Clare and Ian Rexroad went in for an ultrasound at 13 weeks, they got shocking news: triplets. “I think in the first few minutes I was laughing hysterically and crying back and forth,” Clare recalls. “It was a very surreal experience. Triplets never cross your mind—ever.”

 

For a triplet pregnancy, it was relatively uneventful. She had weekly doctor appointments because of the risks that can come with having triplets, but by week 19, things were good, and the couple prepared for what lay ahead (for Ian that meant selling his beloved car to buy a minivan).

 

Then, around 24 weeks, Clare woke in the middle of the night with unusual pain. She knew something was wrong and rushed to the hospital. “Especially with a triplet pregnancy, they say, don't take any chances: call, go to the hospital, do what you need to be seen,” she says.

 

She was kept overnight for observation, and after about a day and a half—Thanksgiving Day—Ian was able to go home for a shower and nap. Clare’s mom, dad, and sister were there to keep her company. But while he was gone, Clare’s pain increased: “My doctor came in to do one last check before she left to go have Thanksgiving with her family. And she checked my cervix and said: ‘These babies are coming out.’”

 

Clare’s dad called Ian, and he rushed back just in time. Eliza was born first via emergency Cesarean birth with Ruth and Henry shortly after. Henry weight 2 pounds, 1 ounce. Eliza and Ruth weighted 1 pound, 14 ounces.

 

“A lot of people can say that the day their kids were born was the best day of their lives—but for me it was one of the scariest,” Clare says. Despite the risks that come with an early birth, all three babies had remarkably few complications, other than being incredibly small and needing oxygen support.

 

In the NICU, the girls were in one room and Henry in another because three babies couldn’t fit together with all the equipment that was needed. And so began the family’s NICU journey.

 

A major stressor for Clare during and after her pregnancy (on top of worrying about her babies’ survival) was maternity leave. In 2018, only four states offered paid maternity leave, and Ohio wasn’t one of them—“so that made it feel like you had to save every hour,” Clare says. “Every doctor's appointment was hard because I was like, ‘oh, this is an hour that I won't get of maternity leave later on.’ So that was stressful and emotional.”

 

Clare and Ian both worked from the NICU. They’d bring their computers in every day and set up telework stations on their little tables. “I worked almost as soon as they were born for two months because I knew I wanted to have time with them when they came home,” she says. “I didn't really have a choice.”

 

It’s unacceptable that the U.S. is still the only industrialized nation with no paid family leave. That’s why March of Dimes advocates for paid leave for all families across the country. Moms like Clare deserve better.

 

“It’s so important that March of Dimes advocates for maternity leave, as well for fathers, to ease that burden,” Clare says. “So that you can spend the critical, important time with your kids when they come home from the hospital. And work shouldn't interfere with that.”

 

But the Rexroad family story doesn’t end there.

 

In January 2018, Eliza and Henry successfully weaned to Continuous Positive Airway Pressure (CPAP), which delivers constant air pressure into a baby's nose through a set of nasal prongs or through a small mask that fits snugly over a baby’s nose. However, Ruth started requiring more oxygen. Then an X-ray showed that she had developed pneumonia.

 

On February 1, Clare and Ian received the worst phone call of their lives: they needed to get to the hospital immediately because things weren’t looking good for Ruth. “[The doctor] had determined that she wasn’t going to make it, and so we sat with her and held her together,” Clare says. “It was the worst day of my life.”

 

Henry and Eliza continued to battle in the NICU while their parents grieved the loss of their sister. “We'd started to identify as triplet parents, getting used to what it was going to be when they were two, when they're five, when they're going off to college and then all those plans just suddenly changed,” Ian adds. “And it was hard.”

 

On March 16 they brought Eliza home, and Henry came home a week later on March 23. “It was incredible, that feeling of taking them home and walking out of the hospital with them and their little bucket seats was like walking on air,” Clare says.

 

Fast forward to 2020: Clare and Ian were excited to find out that they were pregnant again. But unfortunately, Clare had a miscarriage at six weeks. They kept trying, and in the summer of 2021, were pregnant again. This time, Clare had a placental abruption and their daughter, Maggie, was born via emergency Cesarean birth at 32 weeks. She weighed 4 pounds, 4 ounces—"so still small and still scary but compared to last time it was a vastly different experience,” Clare says. Maggie spent two months in the NICU.

 

Today, Clare and Ian have three very healthy kids running around the house. “The mission of March of Dimes is so critical,” Clare emphasizes. “Our family has received direct benefit from the research that March of Dimes has done with the use of surfactant on all our children that was lifesaving for them in the NICU. Also being able to spend time home with my kids after they were born was so important and especially when you go through something like we’ve been through you need that time to heal, to grieve, to spend time with your family. Everyone deserves to be able to spend that time with their kids.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

REXROAD — SHORT VERSION

 

Headline:

They say you can work remotely anywhere these days—but for most of us, the NICU isn’t the first place that comes to mind

 

When Clare and Ian Rexroad went in for an ultrasound at 13 weeks, they got shocking news: triplets. For a triplet pregnancy, it was relatively uneventful. Clare had weekly doctor appointments because of the risks that can come with having triplets, but by week 19, things were good, and the couple prepared for what lay ahead.

 

Then, around 24 weeks, Clare woke in the middle of the night with unusual pain. She knew something was wrong and rushed to the hospital. She was kept overnight for observation, and after about a day and a half—Thanksgiving Day—Clare’s pain increased: “My doctor came in to do one last check before she left to go have Thanksgiving with her family. And she checked my cervix and said: ‘These babies are coming out.’”

 

Eliza was born first via emergency Cesarean birth with Ruth and Henry shortly after. Henry weight 2 pounds, 1 ounce. Eliza and Ruth weighed 1 pound, 14 ounces. And so began the family’s NICU journey. “A lot of people can say that the day their kids were born was the best day of their lives—but for me it was one of the scariest,” Clare says.

 

A major stressor for Clare during and after her pregnancy (on top of worrying about her babies’ survival) was maternity leave. Since the state of Ohio didn’t offer paid maternity leave, she and Ian both worked from the NICU. “I worked almost as soon as they were born for two months because I knew I wanted to have time with them when they came home,” Clare recalls.

 

It’s unacceptable that the U.S. is still the only industrialized nation with no paid family leave. That’s why March of Dimes advocates for paid leave for all families across the country. Moms like Clare deserve better. “It’s so important that March of Dimes advocates for maternity leave, as well for fathers, to ease that burden,” she says. “So that you can spend the critical, important time with your kids when they come home from the hospital.”

 

But the Rexroad family story doesn’t end there.

 

In January 2018, Eliza and Henry successfully weaned to Continuous Positive Airway Pressure (CPAP), which delivers constant air pressure into a baby's nose through a set of nasal prongs or through a small mask that fits snugly over a baby’s nose. However, Ruth started requiring more oxygen. Then an X-ray showed that she had developed pneumonia.

 

Sadly, Ruth passed away on February 1. Meanwhile, Henry and Eliza continued to battle in the NICU while their parents grieved the loss of their sister.

 

Both Eliza and Henry were finally able to go home the following month.

 

Fast forward to 2020: Clare and Ian were excited to find out that they were pregnant again. But unfortunately, Clare had a miscarriage at six weeks. They kept trying, and in the summer of 2021, were pregnant again. This time, Clare had a placental abruption and their daughter, Maggie, was born via emergency Cesarean birth at 32 weeks. She weighed 4 pounds, 4 ounces, and spent two months in the NICU.

 

Today, Clare and Ian have three very healthy kids running around the house and are grateful for the support they received from March of Dimes before, during, and after their pregnancies.














2022 WELLS WILLIAMS FAMILY STORY




Family Story Assets (Word Document, Photos)
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WELLS WILLIAMS FAMILY STORY FULL VERSION

 

LOVE IS LOVE

 

While every LGBTQIA+ couples’ journey toward becoming parents is different in details, each begins the same: with love. Kendra and Kelli Wells Williams never thought they’d get pregnant on the first try with in vitro fertilization (IVF) but were excited and shocked when they did. “The first time I knew I was in love with my daughter was when I felt her inside of me because I had wanted her for so long,” Kendra shares. “And over the years it seemed like I may never meet her.”

 

Like all new parents, they felt wildly unprepared, but they found comfort in at least having nine months to get ready. At their 22-week checkup with the high-risk group at Rush Hospital in Chicago, Kendra’s doctor discovered that her cervix had begun to open, and she needed to have emergency surgery to put in a cervical cerclage (sutures or synthetic tape to reinforce the cervix during pregnancy) to keep her cervix closed until at least 36–37 weeks. After some panic, Kendra and Kelli felt a sigh of relief and carried on with their lives as usual.

 

Eleven days later, one Sunday morning while they were out shopping for maternity clothes, Kendra started to feel immense cramping. They immediately called their OBGYN. “She told us in no uncertain terms that if we wanted the baby to survive, that we needed to go directly to Rush,” Kendra recalls.

 

Once they arrived at the hospital, Kendra’s water had broken and she was hemorrhaging, and she needed multiple blood transfusions. She had to go under general anesthesia and have an emergency Caesarian birth—for which she was completely knocked out. Kaelyn was born at 24 weeks on May 15, 2011, weighing one pound, five ounces.

 

When Kendra woke up, Kaelyn had already been whisked away to the NICU. “It was quite emotional being wheeled into the NICU the evening after I gave birth,” Kendra adds. “I had never been in one before and there are tons of sounds. And there were so many incubators just kind of in this large space, and parents, guardians or visitors next to them. It was very overwhelming.”

 

With her wife unconscious and healing after the surgery, Kelli’s entire focus was on their new baby. She recalls “that heart-dropping moment when you realize your kid’s barely big enough to fit in the doctor's hand.”

 

Though initially terrified, the care they received from day one in the NICU helped ease them into their new reality. “The care that we got that night as parents who had never been exposed to anything like this, the doctor handheld us and walked us through what our daughter's life could be like at two in the morning,” Kelli adds. “She sat with us for over an hour, and that's when I believed that my kid could live and be okay.”

 

Kendra and Kelli couldn’t hold their new baby until nearly a week later. Kaelyn had already experienced a surgery by then—six days after she was born. Her lungs were underdeveloped, and she had many difficulties, including an intraventricular hemorrhage (bleeding inside or around the ventricles in the brain), which fortunately drained on its own.

 

“I'm a police officer, I've been in life threatening situations, I was in a house fire—nothing can compare to the fear of having a child in the NICU,” Kelli emphasizes.

 

The NICU is an undeniable scary place, but Kendra is thankful for her two primary nurses, who were part of the March of Dimes NICU Family Support® program, as she only felt comfortable leaving the hospital for a few hours each day because she knew Kaelyn was safe in their care.

 

After 17 long weeks in the NICU, Kaelyn was ready to go home. “It was probably one of the happiest days of my life to just finally be able to take her home, hold her without tubes and cords and someone being there to watch us—to just get her home to our quiet apartment, and it just be us as a family the way we always hoped that it would be,” Kendra says.

 

Kaelyn is 11 today, and she does face some challenges: she was diagnosed with ADHD when she was five; she’s gone through physical, developmental, occupational and speech therapy; and she suffers from sensory processing disorder and anxiety.

 

Being a same-sex couple, Kendra and Kelli have faced many challenges of their own. “There have been instances in our pregnancy where we were treated differently,” Kendra says. “Some by just regular people, not grasping the concept of two married women trying to start a family. A lot of assumptions that we were sisters—and that's why she was at appointments with me.”

 

On top of all that, they’ve experienced legal obstacles…”obstacles that heterosexual couples wouldn't experience, even if they weren't married,” Kendra adds. “For instance, Kelli could never sign off any documents in the hospital because technically Kaelyn wasn't legally her daughter.” While Kelli did legally adopt Kaelyn as planned, she couldn’t sign any hospital documents or give permission for any procedures until the adoption was finalized, as her name wasn’t on Kaelyn’s birth certificate.

 

In Illinois in 2011, civil unions weren’t yet legal (they wouldn’t be until a year later)—and gay marriage wouldn’t be legalized until 2014. “We've jumped through a lot of hoops to make sure our family is secured and safe, and that we can both act as parental figures for Kaelyn,” Kendra says.

 

But luckily, their experience at the hospital was overall positive. “From conception through delivery, through our time in the NICU, they included and accepted me without question from day one,” Kelli shares. “Having that acceptance was everything because that's the last thing I could have probably dealt with at that time, was them questioning my love for my kid or whether or not I should be able to make that decision,” she shares.

 

Kendra and Kelli are beyond grateful for the lifesaving surfactant therapy that Kaelyn was able to get, thanks to March for Dimes’ research. That’s why they continue to raise funds and take part in the March for Babies walks today.

 

While they’re unable to have any more babies of their own, in July 2021, Kendra and Kelli decided to grow their family by adopting their daughter, Layla—who went home with them when she was three days old. “Kaelyn was excited at the thought of having a sibling because she's wanted one for a long time,” Kendra shares. “And I've had to have conversations with her that always brings upon my mom guilt about why I can't just have another baby in my tummy. Having Layla in the family has helped her mature a little bit because she can see how much of a role model she is for Layla. Layla completely adores Kaelyn—to watch the magic of these two, it's been amazing.”

 

Together, let's ensure healthy pregnancies for all families, no matter who they are. As Kendra puts it: “Love is family, regardless of what that's composed of.”



WELLS WILLIAMS FAMILY STORY SHORT VERSION

 

LOVE IS LOVE

 

While every LGBTQIA+ couples’ journey toward becoming parents is different in details, each begins the same: with love. Kendra and Kelli Wells Williams were excited and shocked to have gotten pregnant on their first try with in vitro fertilization (IVF). While they initially felt—as all new parents do—wildly unprepared, they took comfort in having nine months to get ready. However, their daughter Kaelyn was born way too soon at 24 weeks on May 15, 2011, weighing one pound, five ounces. Her lungs were underdeveloped, and she had many difficulties, including needing surgery.

 

After 17 long weeks in the NICU, Kaelyn was ready to go home. “It was probably one of the happiest days of my life to just finally be able to take her home, hold her without tubes and cords and someone being there to watch us—to just get her home to our quiet apartment, and it just be us as a family the way we always hoped that it would be,” Kendra shares. Kaelyn is 11 today, and she does face some challenges: she was diagnosed with ADHD when she was five; she’s gone through physical, developmental, occupational and speech therapy; and she suffers from sensory processing disorder and anxiety.

 

Being a same-sex couple, Kendra and Kelli have faced many challenges of their own: from people not grasping the concept of two women trying to start a family, to legal obstacles involving Kelli adopting Kaelyn. In Illinois in 2011, civil unions weren’t yet legal (they wouldn’t be until a year later)—and gay marriage wouldn’t be legalized until 2014. “We've jumped through a lot of hoops to make sure our family is secured and safe, and that we can both act as parental figures for Kaelyn,” Kendra says.

 

While they’re unable to have any more babies of their own, in July 2021, Kendra and Kelli decided to grow their family by adopting their daughter, Layla—and Kaelyn is thrilled to be a big sister. “Love is family, regardless of what that's composed of,” Kendra adds.

 

Together, let’s ensure healthy pregnancies for all families, no matter who they are.


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